Rejection Creates Blessing Blockers

Rejection played a considerable part when it came to the Cancer I had. Since then, I've become a self-proclaimed expert on the subject of Rejection. Rejection is a hard thing for anyone. I know of some who weather this demon better than others. Me, not so much. (Of course, I'm speaking about the past.) Due to all my experience with this beast, I've learned a few things that I'd love to pass along. 

When Rejection visits, it creates what I call "Blessing Blockers."

These Blessing Blockers slow down the progress of being successful in life. Life, meaning that it encompasses every "thing." Some such "things" are personal relationships of a spouse, social acquaintances, financial as in dealing with bosses and workmates, business endeavors, etc.

Blessing Blockers should never be ignored. As a Christian, you should live daily in the Blessings of God. I mean, who needs more delays in having a successful life? Right? So, here are a few to recognize. If possible, get rid of and avoid them altogether.

Isolation: 
Isolation is a method of self-protection. This approach is what a person utilizes after being hurt numerous times. Its' belief is that isolating is the best way to elude Rejection. Strangely, it seems to be the best option at the time. But, in all actuality, isolation is very painful in and of itself. Before you know it, separation becomes a miserable prison faster than you'd expect.

This self-imprisonment happens when the fear of Rejection has completely taken over your life. You would do almost anything to keep from being hurt like that again. It seems that isolation will help to protect by building up walls to block out all the pain. These invisible walls pretend to protect, but it's only a lie and extremely dangerous.

Morris Cerullo teaches. "Man lives in two worlds: He lives in the natural world … and, he lives in the spiritual world. What is manifested in the natural world is a reflection of what is happening in the spirit world. ALL TRUTH IS PARALLEL! If all truths are parallel, we can assume that building walls can create blockages within your physical heart, too. 

I was masterful at isolating myself. Once, while on an evangelistic trip, I was able to climb within myself while being around others. I didn't feel real safe (free from being rejected) around them. That caused me to go into self-protection mode the whole time. That how super familiar I was with Rejection. In a New York minute, I was ready to self-protect so to escape any rebuff again. It was easy for me to go back inside me. I was used to living life independently while in a crowd.

I received my aha moment when a fellow evangelist commented on how I seemed to be okay with being alone and not interacting with them. I realized just how quickly I could isolate myself. It was such a revelation of how Rejection was ruling my life and robbing me of all my Blessings. Wow. Talk about the ability to sequester, no matter the situation - any time, anywhere.

That isolating skill set had to be challenged and removed from my life. The first thing I did was change my pattern of thinking. This had to be done if I was ever going to reach my destiny and make a difference for the Kingdom of God. My old motto of "A controlled world is a safe world," was a complete lie. I determined to exchange it for the truth.

The truth was that I'm not rejected because I'm accepted in the Beloved. What this means is that I'm loved, wanted, and desired. Plus, God will never abandon me ever. I didn't need to self-protect because of God's protection over my life! I continued decrees these truths out loud. At times it sounded stupid - or at least the devil tried to make to think that. But, I continued until I genuinely believed it within my heart. 

Isolation leads to loneliness. Choosing loneliness instead of living an abundant life is never fulfilling. Believe me when I say, "Isolation never works." Life is life, and people are people. No matter how hard you try, there's always someone that will cause hurt. And, life, here on earth, is never going to be a perfect utopia. (A utopia is an imagined place of perfection.) There's no abundant life found in an imaginary place. The abundant life is a real-life that is found only in Christ.

If you are isolating yourself, I invite you to challenge and uproot it with the truth! The truth will set you free! You don't need this anymore, either.

Control: 
Here's another one that will cause your Blessings to be Blocked. Once again, it's a typical reaction after a rejection has occurred.

When controlling, you monitor or hover over everything in your life. This is to make sure you are in control of it all. Somehow the belief is that if you are in control, then no one will ever be able to cause you pain. The anthem song for this mindset would be "control and dominate every situation before you get dominated and hurt."

To be in control of your environment, you have to be on top of your game both mentally and physically - constantly. You have to make sure you're "one-upping," or at least, one step ahead of everyone, everything and in every circumstance 24/7. Whew! That's a huge energy waster. It's way too much stress to take on, especially when battling Cancer.

Cancer is a tyrant of a controller and sometimes dominates years of a person's life. This kind of domination controls your life and is possibly a number one fear of most people. One way to overcome the fear of being out of control is to recognize that ultimately, God is in control of your life. God can indeed be trusted to take the reigns. He's a good, loving God. He focuses on you more than you might think. God says that His thoughts are on you numerous times a day. Psalm 40:5a NAS, "MANY, O Lord my God, are the wonders which You have done, And Your thoughts towards us." Just knowing this relaxes a soul. Take a minute and think about it - you're on God's mind. He takes extraordinary care of you at all times, especially in a Cancer trial.

Now add isolation to control, and it is double misery. Twinsies! These two are the worst. They are the double whammy of the Blessing Blockers. When you're living life with both of these in action, you're in extreme survival mode. This leaves no place for God to work on your behalf. It's just "survival of the fittest," and Cancer takes away the "fittest" part.

Seriously, when you think about it - that makes it virtually impossible to achieve much control at all. Being in survival mode is not a fun place to be, and honestly, it's destructive. Destructive, in the sense that it abandons all reliance on God. Relying on God is a must, especially during a Cancer trial.

Loneliness:  
Loneliness is a huge misperception that portrays God as One who has abandoned you. It causes you to jump to conclusions that God is not on this journey with you. You buy into the lie that fighting Cancer is your lot in life.

You may even continue doing spiritual things such as pray to God for a miracle. But, deep within your heart, you don't trust that God will answer nor will He show up for you. Loneliness deflates all faith.

So, dismiss the "Lone Ranger" mentality because life just doesn't work well without God. Press through being lonely. Challenge it by beginning to believe within your heart that God is with you. Then, continue uprooting these Blessing Blocker and refuse to live in a survival mode any longer. Speak truth to yourself that God is with you, and He is trustworthy.

You also need people like a support team to surround you during this time. Every human needs to be cherished and to feel like they fit in. That's what support should be. If you don't have much support check out some positive activities to connect with people. Amazingly, positive activities give you the added support needed.

Disappointments: 
Another blessing blocker is disappointments. These can come from feeling like God has let you down. You might be one who has put your trust in God but was sorely disappointed. Now, you feel like you can't or won't rely on Him anymore. The truth is that God is still on the throne, and it's not over yet. God's still working in your situation.

Here's a reminder: Christians have an enemy who loves to have us accuse God when it's not God's fault whatsoever. Please don't forget that. If the enemy succeeds, you'll find it harder than ever to receive your Blessings.

Honestly, God isn't the one who's disappointing you. This trial with Cancer is just a bump in the road. Try not to stay "stuck" in any disappointment. Put forth the effort to continue moving forward in Christ.

If you've put your trust in family or friends and they've let you down, realize that people are human and they make mistakes. Sometimes, those who've hurt you haven't acknowledged it...yet. Nonetheless, try your hardest to forgive them. When you do, it will free you up to receive your Blessings much faster.

Next suggestion is to locate where you've placed your hope. Consciously recognize if it's been placed in people or God. If it has been put in people, then get busy removing it and then place it back in God. It might take a while, but it's achievable with some self-talk. The deal about self-talk is that it has been scientifically proven that you will believe your own voice more than any other. That means, when you decree that your hope is in the Lord, you'll believe it. 

When we trust that God knows best, even though we don't like the answer, it's much easier for hope to thrive. And, we all need hope because hope feeds faith. We're required to have a child-like faith! That's faith at it's purest - eager to believe for the impossible.

Removing Blessing Blockers:  
Removing these Blessing Blockers is in the hope of trying to lighten your load during this battle. By extricating these thieves, I believe it will help connect you with the Lord in a much deeper relational way. By enhancing your relationship with God, it imparts a much-needed strength. You'll soon find yourself better than ever, spirit, soul, and body.

Since we've all had different and unique life experiences, with no two situations alike, there may be other Blessing Blockers that I've not discussed. So, I trust that the Lord will reveal and deliver you of any other that Rejection has brought into your life.

Partner with God:
Partnering with God means to work with Him. More than likely, it means to ALLOW God to work in your life. Trust that He'll remove them as you confidently challenge these robbers. It's past time for Rejection to be defeated, and your prayers answered, and Blessings to be UnBlocked as forgiveness is given. IT IS HIGH TIME to let these go! 

Be Blessed, My Cancer-Free Friend!

The Power of Positive Activities - Unconventional Support

All Warriors need support! And, support comes in many forms. But, sometimes, if you don't have any, you've just gotta go out and find it for yourself. That was the situation I was in. So, what I did was look for uplifting activities that weren't too taxing.

Uplifting activities are so important to seek out during a battle with Cancer. I genuinely can't emphasize this enough. One such activity that I just happened to hear about at my Cancer Center was a program by the @americancancersociety. I know not all areas have this - we were fortunate.

The name of this program was "Look Good, Feel Great!" And, precisely that's what it did. As I signed up, the promise was that I'd learn how to apply makeup. You might be wondering what makeup application has to do with a person going through cancer, but I'm telling you - it is essential.

From my perspective, this program's design helps those going through Cancer feel like a cherished human being. And, to also have a little bit of fun and comradery with other's who are dealing with the same dreaded enemy. My experience with this particular group of people taught me a lot about our basic need to love and be loved. Plus, everyone needs a cheerleader - that person who tells you that you can make it! I didn't realize at the time how much it would impact my life the way it did. They, in my opinion, were the best at encouraging a soul at their lowest.

This positive activity made all of us know how to feel good about our self, which is extremely important. Because we all know that losing your hair can be traumatizing in itself, let alone making you feel so out of control. Without any hair, I hate to say it, but I felt alien-like.

I can't say enough wonderful things about this program, and the leadership was impressive! These volunteers were very experienced since each one had already gone through Cancer themselves. They understood us entirely and provided such encouraged in ways others couldn't have. They were the affirming, breath of fresh air remedy needed for the current miserable diagnosis.

They started their tutorial on how to apply makeup. Each Warrior was gifted a $200.00 bag of designer makeup. The driving force behind why I joined was to learn how to draw on my eyebrows. I had only a few remaining and knew I desired to try and look as normal as I possibly could.

When it came time to apply the mascara, the lead lady said, "Go ahead and use the mascara if you still have lashes. Because you need to rock 'em while you got 'em!" Seriously, right then she became my new bestie! With that one statement, everyone (I) felt at ease about my circumstance.

Regarding lashes, we were all at various stages. Some of the ladies had all of theirs; most had only a few hanging on, while others had none. No one was left out.

We continued bonding: exchanging our experiences with Cancer thus far while practicing our newly found beauty secret skills.

We earnestly listened as they shared stories along with displaying an array of memorabilia from their own Cancer journey. One volunteer showed us her pictures of when she was bald. That gave me an extreme amount of confidence in knowing that I'd make it too. Next, they showed us a selection of wigs and hats. They passed out coupons and samples of supplement drinks and told us that free wigs were available at the American Cancer Society.

As I participated, I was thankful and inspired by these survivors. They helped me realize that I could get through this trial. And, make the best of it by having as much fun as possible. It was then that I determined to look at myself differently - to give myself a break - to love myself - to take special care of myself during this process.

I determined to no longer focus on how Cancer had made me look. Nor see myself as a hairless alien that I barely recognized in the mirror. But, I endeavor to see myself worthy of love - no matter how I looked.

Amazingly, it was such a light atmosphere even though this was a heavy topic on the burden we were bearing. We chatted and enjoyed our refreshments a little while longer before we HAD to leave. No one wanted to go. Probably, the reason why it was so hard leaving was this beautiful, uplifting atmosphere.

I'm not going to lie; drawing on my eyelashes was the highlight. In reflection, this group formed due to a dreadful situation. And, for a moment, we had forgotten the reason why we connected. We were no long Cancer patients/aliens/lepers - we had become human again.

We forgot all about Cancer's aches and pains because our focus had shifted. In a positive way, we were reminded to love and take good care of ourself. To look good, feel great! We didn't feel alone anymore because we had become a family that day, not by choice but by a momentary circumstance.

To be honest, when I arrived at the meeting, I wasn't feeling very well. But, by the end of this class, I felt significantly happier. I noticed that I didn't feel sick anymore. As I walked to my car, I felt accomplished in my developed skill set of drawing on eyebrows. I even had a pep in my step.

That's what a positive activity can do - it will shift your focus. For those two hours, my mind was not on Cancer. It was onto something so delightful and carefree.

That day I realized that Cancer couldn't control how I felt on the inside. And, in my mind, I looked like a million bucks (even though I was bald and my eyelashes and eyebrows were sparse.)

As I walked to my car, I carried my free bag of makeup proudly. I was smiling inside and out. I also left there with a brand new attitude. That's what a positive activity experience can do for you too - whether you have Cancer or not. And, as a friend, I'm saying you need this also!

I've since heard that they are doing away with this program, which makes me sad. I'm hoping the American Cancer Society will continue it. And, maybe, just maybe if they receive positive feedback themselves, they will choose to keep this program going. Warriors need this - they need their confidence boosted as much as possible. 

This program, by far, was my favorite thing I did as I went through treatments. I do know that applying makeup might not be your thing. All I'm saying is - find your fun, positive activity that sifts your focus off of Cancer.

Here's my challenge for you! Please, please, please, seek out as many positive activities as needed because support is key! It might be unconventional support but believe me - it will be worth your while!

(Note: I am not a representative for ACS.)

To keep a Cancer-free focus - plan a Cancer-free party. "My Ah-maz-ing Cancer-Free Party Planner" can be purchased on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/My-Ah-maz-ing-Cancer-Free-Party-Planner-ebook/dp/B0855KFKFK/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=My+Ah-maz-ing+Cancer-Free+Party+Planner+Kathy+A.+Crofford&qid=1589483675&sr=8-1